The sanctity of a birth story

One of my joys in life is the fact that I get to be a mom! Maybe a lot of people think this is silly, but for as long as I can remember I wanted to be a mom and my dream car has always been a mini-van. There are days where I remember that this is what my heart has longed for, and then there are days when I really need to remind myself that this is what I prayed for.:)

Jason and I celebrated our ten year anniversary this past summer, and we spent some time talking about what we dreamed about 10 years ago. Life didn't go the way we planned, but it's so much richer, deeper, better, and crazier than we ever could have planned!! One of the things that we didn't plan was the way we would become parents. We've never been able to birth children, but we have children "of our own". We have 5 kids...2 adopted almost 7 years ago, 2 that will be legally adopted finally this spring, and 1 sweet baby that we are "fostering". I don't care about their title...they are mine, because God chose me to love them for however long they are in my home.

Something that I struggle with is protecting the sanctity of their birth story. All 5 of my babies are miracles! They all have a beautiful story of redemption and grace...but so does every child. From what I hear, the birthing process is not easy. Each child is a beautiful testimony that miracles still happen on this earth! So, when people come up to me and want details about my children's history I have to assess: Are you asking me this because you care about my child, or are you asking this because you want to judge a birth parent? Forgive me for my diatribe, but yesterday I had a woman I barely know come up to me and say, "I hear you are fostering..."and proceeded to tell me things that she had heard about my baby. Here's the thing, these 5 kiddos are not the sum of a sad story. We all have a story to tell, but it's ours to tell. I want my kiddos to have their own story to tell. We have always been very open with our kids about their story, and that they are here through the miracle of adoption, but in a way that protects their heart and gives a hope and a future. I want their story to be a part of who they are, not the defining moment of their life.

Adoption is beautiful and amazing and I love that God uses it here and now to show his love for the "fatherless". In our home we have 5 kids who could have been defined by that term, but they aren't! They have been given an earthly father(and mother) who loves them like crazy, and we get to share with them the love of an eternal father...because in this life we all can feel many emotions about our "birth story". We live in a broken world with lots of sad stories. We don't have to be defined by them. We can face the day like the miracle we are, or we can let "our story" define us. I know what I am choosing! And I am also choosing to pass this a long to my kids!

I'm protecting the sanctity of their birth story, not because of the miracle, but because in it I choose to worship the "Miracle Giver."


"For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us." Eph 1:4-8